I do not bring politics or religion into any of my presentations. However, this unique moment in history does bring an opportunity to visit and apply one of the behavioral skills that I teach on emotional regulation.
I thought that Hillary Clinton would win the election in a landslide. I just couldn’t imagine that the USA population would accept or ignore the manner that Trump ran his campaign with his uncensored remarks. Plus, I know how the markets strive for certainty and I was afraid of what might happen if Trump was elected.
Like many people I was caught off guard and very surprised at the outcome. Two of my coaching clients were very distraught, angry and even depressed by this outcome. They were so affected that it was noticeable and had friends and family seriously concerned.
Fortunately I had an opportunity to have a call with each of them right after the election. Here is the gist of how the call went. My philosophy is that stress and suffering are both self-imposed. Most people don’t want to have this type of a conversation because it means that you don’t get to be a victim and blame someone or something outside of yourself.
You would be absolutely amazed at how easy it is for people to be attached to blaming. One of the key components of being a top leader is to live in 100% responsibility. That’s one of my coaching commandments, “I am the source of all that I experience versus going victim and blaming others”.
I explained that now that Trump is elected you need to live in the reality of what is and not be upset because things didn’t turn out the way that you thought they should have. Now it’s time to make a choice. What are you going to pay attention to? You can decide to focus on how terrible, horrible and awful your think this is and how the world now will come to an end.
That choice reminds me of this quote by Richard Bach;
“The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly.”
Quantum theory explains that our world is filled with multiple possibilities, multiple potentials all super imposed as wave lengths of possibility until you make your selection. Once you choose than all other wave lengths collapse and the only thing that is left is your choice.
So I told my clients to go ahead and give themselves a time to be angry, depressed, disappointed and to feel the emotions that are present. Allow them to surface. Don’t attempt to suppress them. Accept them. However, give yourself a time limit. So, for the next 3 hours for example, allow yourself to feel and embrace the injustice of it all. Then, after that time, stop. Period!
No more victim perspective. Now it’s time to tune into opportunities and positive possibilities. What good can now happen with Trump in the white house? How can you be of service to assist in Donald Trump being a successful president? Get excited. Tap into the scientific principle of “Act as if”. The human brain cannot tell the difference between what is real and what is vividly imagined.
There is a formula to this effect;
I x V = R
This means Imagination x Vividness = Reality
The same area of the brain is activated when you imagine shooting foul shots as when you physically practice shooting the shots.
There is no other choice. The science is clear. There are multiple manifestations from a physiological and mental standpoint in reaction to the nature of your thoughts. You must choose a positive attitude and outlook.
When I travel and I’m walking through the very crowded Atlanta airport to my next connecting flight I catch myself all the time saying, “I love everything about what I do!” As I’m driving my rental car to my next city for the next two hours to an isolated resort at 11:00 pm after a presentation 3,000 miles away that same day I say to myself, “I love everything about this!”
What is the alternative? That’s what I call double duty! Not only is the unpleasant thing happening but you are also upset about it.
The purpose of this note is to be an advocate for positive mental attitude. However, I must emphasize that this advocacy is in alignment with what the science says about how the brain responds to the nature of your thoughts and what physiological changes happen because of your thoughts.
So get excited and be creative, not reactive! Same letters, different arrangement!